January 19, 2016

My dearest Paytan….
You were a gift from God that I cherished every single day. I waited longer to have you than I had the honour of having you with me.
My heart is in a million pieces … And yet I have to find the beats to carry your sister through the darkness.
My screams are silent as I can’t even find the words to express my devastation of loosing you.
My thoughts are like the swirling whirl of water pulling me under the helplessness I have, as not to have been able to make it all better.
I’ve lost my breath, and feel faint and sick at the same time.
My memories are surrounded by your smiles and love.
I have no words to say how much you meant to me.
Mommy